Chris Worfolk's Blog


The Norris Mock

April 26th, 2013 | Distractions

The 2013 NFL Draft starts tonight! Prior to the actual draft, a number of people produce a mock draft, showing their predictions as to what teams will draft what players, including Kiper, Scouts Inc and ESPN bloggers.

While I won’t claim to be an expert in NFL drafting, I have produced a mock of my own, showing what would happen if franchises were allowed to draft Chuck Norris. Obviously, being Chuck Norris he would be able to play every position, for all teams simultaneously, and thus this has been reflected in the mock.

Team Round Position Overall Pick
Kansas City Chiefs 1 1 1 Chuck Norris
Jacksonville Jaguars 1 2 2 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders 1 3 3 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 1 4 4 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 1 5 5 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns 1 6 6 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 1 7 7 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 1 8 8 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 1 9 9 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 1 10 10 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 1 11 11 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 1 12 12 Chuck Norris
New York Jets (via TB) 1 13 13 Chuck Norris
Carolina Panthers 1 14 14 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints 1 15 15 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 1 16 16 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 1 17 17 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 1 18 18 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 1 19 19 Chuck Norris
Chicago Bears 1 20 20 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 1 21 21 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams (via WAS) 1 22 22 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 1 23 23 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 1 24 24 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings (via SEA) 1 25 25 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 1 26 26 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 1 27 27 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 1 28 28 Chuck Norris
New England Patriots 1 29 29 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 1 30 30 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 1 31 31 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 1 32 32 Chuck Norris
 
Jacksonville Jaguars 2 1 33 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers (via KC) 2 2 34 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 2 3 35 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 2 4 36 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals (via OAK) 2 5 37 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 2 6 38 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns (Supplemental Draft) 2 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 2 7 39 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 2 8 40 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 2 9 41 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 2 10 42 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 2 11 43 Chuck Norris
Carolina Panthers 2 12 44 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints (forfeited) 2 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 2 13 45 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 2 14 46 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 2 15 47 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 2 16 48 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 2 17 49 Chuck Norris
Chicago Bears 2 18 50 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 2 19 51 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 2 20 52 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 2 21 53 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins (via IND) 2 22 54 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 2 23 55 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 2 24 56 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 2 25 57 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 2 26 58 Chuck Norris
New England Patriots 2 27 59 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 2 28 60 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 2 29 61 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 2 30 62 Chuck Norris
 
Kansas City Chiefs 3 1 63 Chuck Norris
Jacksonville Jaguars 3 2 64 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 3 3 65 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders 3 4 66 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 3 5 67 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns 3 6 68 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 3 7 69 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 3 8 70 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 3 9 71 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 3 10 72 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 3 11 73 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers (via CAR) 3 12 74 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints 3 13 75 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 3 14 76 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 3 15 77 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 3 16 78 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 3 17 79 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 3 18 80 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 3 19 81 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins (via CHI) 3 20 82 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 3 21 83 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 3 22 84 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 3 23 85 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 3 24 86 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 3 25 87 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 3 26 88 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 3 27 89 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 3 28 90 Chuck Norris
New England Patriots 3 29 91 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 3 30 92 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 3 31 93 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 3 32 94 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 3 33 95 Chuck Norris
Kansas City Chiefs 3 34 96 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 3 35 97 Chuck Norris
 
Jacksonville Jaguars 4 1 98 Chuck Norris
Kansas City Chiefs 4 2 99 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders 4 3 100 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 4 4 101 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings (via DET) 4 5 102 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 4 6 103 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns 4 7 104 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 4 8 105 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 4 9 106 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 4 10 107 Chuck Norris
Carolina Panthers 4 11 108 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints 4 12 109 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 4 13 110 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 4 14 111 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 4 15 112 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 4 16 113 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 4 17 114 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 4 18 115 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 4 19 116 Chuck Norris
Chicago Bears 4 20 117 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 4 21 118 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 4 22 119 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 4 23 120 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 4 24 121 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 4 25 122 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 4 26 123 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 4 27 124 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 4 28 125 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (via NE) 4 29 126 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 4 30 127 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 4 31 128 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 4 32 129 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 4 33 130 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 4 34 131 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 4 35 132 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 4 36 133 Chuck Norris
 
Kansas City Chiefs 5 1 134 Chuck Norris
Jacksonville Jaguars 5 2 135 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 5 3 136 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 5 4 137 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks (via OAK) 5 5 138 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns 5 6 139 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 5 7 140 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 5 8 141 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 5 9 142 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 5 10 143 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints 5 11 144 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 5 12 145 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 5 13 146 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 5 14 147 Chuck Norris
Carolina Panthers 5 15 148 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 5 16 149 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 5 17 150 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 5 18 151 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 5 19 152 Chuck Norris
Chicago Bears 5 20 153 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 5 21 154 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 5 22 155 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 5 23 156 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers (via IND) 5 24 157 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 5 25 158 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 5 26 159 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 5 27 160 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 5 28 161 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins (via NE) 5 29 162 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 5 30 163 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns (via SF) 5 31 164 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 5 32 165 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 5 33 166 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 5 34 167 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 5 35 168 Chuck Norris
 
Jacksonville Jaguars 6 1 169 Chuck Norris
Kansas City Chiefs 6 2 170 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 6 3 171 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders 6 4 172 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers (from CLE, via PHI) 6 5 173 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals 6 6 174 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns 6 7 175 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders (from ARI, via MIN, TEN) 6 8 176 Chuck Norris
Buffalo Bills 6 9 177 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 6 10 178 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 6 11 179 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers (via MIA) 6 12 180 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 6 13 181 Chuck Norris
Carolina Panthers 6 14 182 Chuck Norris
New Orleans Saints 6 15 183 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 6 16 184 Chuck Norris
Dallas Cowboys 6 17 185 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 6 18 186 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 6 19 187 Chuck Norris
Chicago Bears 6 20 188 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 6 21 189 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 6 22 190 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 6 23 191 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 6 24 192 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 6 25 193 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 6 26 194 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 6 27 195 Chuck Norris
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (from PHI via DEN) 6 28 196 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals (via NE) 6 29 197 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 6 30 198 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens (via SF) 6 31 199 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 6 32 200 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 6 33 201 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 6 34 202 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 6 35 203 Chuck Norris
Kansas City Chiefs 6 36 204 Chuck Norris
Oakland Raiders 6 37 205 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 6 38 206 Chuck Norris
 
Kansas City Chiefs 7 1 207 Chuck Norris
Jacksonville Jaguars 7 2 208 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals (via OAK) 7 3 209 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 7 4 210 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 7 5 211 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles (via CLE) 7 6 212 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings (via ARI) 7 7 213 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings (via BUF/SEA) 7 8 214 Chuck Norris
New York Jets 7 9 215 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 7 10 216 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 7 11 217 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles (via TB) 7 12 218 Chuck Norris
Arizona Cardinals (via OAK) 7 13 219 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks (via NO) 7 14 220 Chuck Norris
San Diego Chargers 7 15 221 Chuck Norris
St. Louis Rams 7 16 222 Chuck Norris
Pittsburgh Steelers 7 17 223 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins (via DAL) 7 18 224 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 7 19 225 Chuck Norris
New England Patriots (via CHI/TB) 7 20 226 Chuck Norris
Cleveland Browns (via SF) 7 21 227 Chuck Norris
Washington Redskins 7 22 228 Chuck Norris
Minnesota Vikings 7 23 229 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 7 24 230 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 7 25 231 Chuck Norris
Green Bay Packers 7 26 232 Chuck Norris
Houston Texans 7 27 233 Chuck Norris
Denver Broncos 7 28 234 Chuck Norris
New England Patriots 7 29 235 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 7 30 236 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 7 31 237 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 7 32 238 Chuck Norris
Philadelphia Eagles 7 33 239 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 7 34 240 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 7 35 241 Chuck Norris
Seattle Seahawks 7 36 242 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 7 37 243 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 7 38 244 Chuck Norris
Detroit Lions 7 39 245 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 7 40 246 Chuck Norris
Baltimore Ravens 7 41 247 Chuck Norris
Tennessee Titans 7 42 248 Chuck Norris
Atlanta Falcons 7 43 249 Chuck Norris
Miami Dolphins 7 44 250 Chuck Norris
Cincinnati Bengals 7 45 251 Chuck Norris
San Francisco 49ers 7 46 252 Chuck Norris
New York Giants 7 47 253 Chuck Norris
Indianapolis Colts 7 48 254 Chuck Norris

SSH tunnel command just logs you in

April 26th, 2013 | Tech

If you’re trying to create an SSH tunnel, you may find that running the command just logs you into the remote server.

ssh -L 27017:somehost:27017 user@examplehost.net

To solve this, you need to use the -N flag.

ssh -L 27017:somehost:27017 -N user@examplehost.net

This will then just set up the forwarding, and not run the command.

Bedroom tax protest

April 25th, 2013 | Photos

Photos from the bedroom tax protest that took place in Leeds.

IMG_0917 IMG_0922 IMG_0921 IMG_0920 IMG_0919 IMG_0918

The slow progress of peace

April 24th, 2013 | Thoughts

Earlier today, new figures for the UK Peace Index showed that murder and violent crime rates have fallen significantly over the last decade.

The figures, reported on BBC News, show that the murder rate has almost halved since 2003, and violent crimes have fallen by a quarter too.

Obviously this is good news. It’s easy to become demoralised about the state of society because an ever increasing global news coverage can sometimes bring out the worst. But the reality is that every year progress is made, the world gets better and people live longer and happier lives.

Red Dwarf X

April 24th, 2013 | Distractions, Reviews

After an extensive hiatus, in which it was basically ended but then it turned out that none of the actors really had much to do, Red Dwarf returned with a ninth series in 2009 with Back to Earth. It was disappointing.

Thankfully, when it returned for a full six episode series in 2012, it was much improved. Instead of trying some kind of clever, existential plot, they just made six episoded of The Dwarf, as if nothing had changed. The result is that it worked! Six more classic episodes added to the series, without ruining the legacy.

Letter to Chaophraya

April 23rd, 2013 | Distractions

The letter campaign starts here.

To Whom It May Concern:

I have long been a fan of your restaurant, which I believe to be the finest Thai restaurant in Leeds.

One of the reasons I have enjoyed your restaurant so much is that you had a dish which consisted of Thai curry sauce, in a Yorkshire pudding, on a steak. As you’re no doubt aware, this is a dish that consists of the three most awesome foods in existence, and was therefore the greatest dish ever.

However, while dining at your restaurant in February, it appeared that the item had been removed from your menu.

If indeed it has been removed, I believe this to be a grave mistake, and one that I would implore you to reconsider.

Your restaurant created what is almost certainly the greatest dish that ever has existed and ever will exist, and for it to be lost forever to the annuals of history would be a great tragedy.

Please consider reintroducing it onto your menu.

Yours faithfully,
Rev Chris Worfolk

chaophraya

Since sending this, I received a very nice reply from Chaophraya saying my feedback would be considered at their regular menu reviews.

All Alone in the Night

April 22nd, 2013 | Video

Time lapse video from the International Space Station. Thanks to David Peterson for posting this, you can find a commentary for it on the YouTube page.

White Rose 2013 speech contest

April 21st, 2013 | Public Speaking

Last month saw White Rose Speakers hold our 2013 international speech and evaluation contest. Actually, we held a speech showcase rather than a contest as I was ineligible to compete due to already having won at Leeds City, so we elected Erik is our club representative to take our club to the area contest.

Meanwhile the evaluation contest was more hotly contested, and I was worried that running out of time hurt my evaluation, but it seems everyone suffered from a little of that and I ended up taking first place. I’m looking forward to learning from these lessons and moving on to the area contest.

Welcome to White Rose Speakers! Chris Worfolk, Evalustion Contest 1st Place White Rose's First Evaluation Contest

The Amber Spyglass

April 20th, 2013 | Books

Having recently read the first two books in the His Dark Materials trilogy, Northern Lights and The Subtle Knife, I moved onto the final part (as is traditional with trilogies – unless you’re Douglas Adams!), The Amber Spyglass.

While I found the previous book a bit hard going in terms of maintaining my interest levels, I had no such problem with this one. Pullman’s description of their voyage to the Land of the Dead kept me riveted, at least as much as I can be to a book. I also found the end heartbreaking and am very glad that Elina is from the same parallel universe that I am (as far as I can tell anyway).

I would say it’s well worth a read, though you do need to read the whole trilogy for it to make any sense. But if you’re a Harry Potter fan, this is worth a read as well.

71067-_03_the_amber_spyglass

Error resolving hostname on SSH tunnels

April 20th, 2013 | Tech

Lets say you are trying to create an SSH tunnel.

ssh -L 27017:somehost:27017 you@examplehost.net

You may get the following error message.

ssh: Error resolving hostname \342\200\223L: nodename nor servname provided, or not known

This is caused by using the wrong kind of minus symbol. If you have copied and pasted the command from somewhere, this is probably the case. This is easy to fix – simply paste the command into your terminal, then go through it, remove the existing minus symbol and put a new – in.