Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

By the time you read this, I will hopefully be dead. Having enjoyed a whirlwind rock music career including a hugely popular album and world war, I will have overdosed on some kind of drug, probably heroin, and thereby before committed myself to the hall of fame of rock music history.

On the off chance that this has not happened, please bring presents.

A couple of years ago, Norman charged George and I with planning a suitable celebration of his 30th birthday. So, in February this year, we began planning a trip to the Scottish Highlands. Seven months and a thousand miles of driving later, and our mission was accomplished.

It is a mission to get to. It took 11 hours to get up there and 10 hours to get back. It was worth the drive though (I say now the back pain has faded). We got incredibly lucky in that we had no rain all week and enjoyed sunshine for most of it. The cruise staff were very keen for me to stress to everyone that I had to use sun cream in the Highlands!

Amazing weather, amazing company and an amazing setting – what more could you possibly want from a holiday?

The view across the loch. The town on the right is Ullapool.

Norman swimming in the loch. I only made it to the river that ran down beside our house into the loch and that was absolutely freezing.

Corrieshalloch Gorge. The photos do not do it justice. It is 200 feet deep.

Our beach-side home for the week.

Best of all, spending a week with seven amazing friends.

A few weeks ago I went to a friend’s christening. Well, a friend’s son’s christening.

That was all fine though it did get a bit weird as in the middle of the service the vicar went into a massive rant about how he hates atheists because we insist that he isn’t allowed to teach his kids about religion (as we do). I seemed to get quite a lot of eye contact during that section…

Last month we had relatives visiting us from Canada, so we spent quite a bit of time doing all the Yorkshire things. Such as Whitby.

As ever, there were lots of seagulls.

And the tourist shops of course.

Those ice cream dogs. They melt and leave a pile of hair all over the floor.

In July we went to a Finnish picnic at Temple Newsam. We got there early so that we had time to go round the farm first. It has all changed since I was a kid – you have to pay to get in now! However, you can now milk a fake cow.

Last month I received a set of bank statements for a bank I have never been a customer of.

9 June 2014

Dear Lloyds Bank:

Please find enclosed some documents that you recently sent me out of the blue. I am not sure why these documents were sent to be as I am not, nor have I ever been, a Lloyds Bank customer. I used to have a Lloyds TSB account, but I closed that down several years ago.

Yours faithfully,
Chris Worfolk

A month later and I have heard nothing back. So I sent them another letter.

14 July 2014

RE: NOT A CUSTOMER

To Whom It May Concern:

Following on from my letter sent to you on 9 June 2014, I enclose further documents you have sent to me. I once again remind you that I am not a customer of Lloyds Bank. If you continue to hold my personal details without my consent, or continue to send me unsolicited mail, I will file a complaint with the Financial Ombudsman Service.

Yours faithfully,
Chris Worfolk

After they they called me and said they were sorting out and would be sending me £30 compensation.

Earlier this month I ran the first of two Area Training days for Toastmasters.

We held it at the Holiday Inn Express in Hull. This is a venue that Hull Speakers use for the regular meetings and makes for a great choice – everything ran really smoothly, lunch was good, and it is easy to get in and out of. Hull is usually a bit of a grim place to visit, but at least the M62 is usually quiet and the drive across Yorkshire and down the estuary past the Humber Bridge is comparatively pretty.

Thank you to everyone who attended and made the day a success. A special thank you to Shelagh, Jane and Michael who presented workshops.

Earlier this month, Yorkshire welcomed the Tour de France to Yorkshire for the Grand Depart. Or “T’ Big Setting Off” as we call it in Yorkshire.

People have gone all out for it. There are bikes, artwork, banners, signs everywhere. Even people nowhere near the route have a bike on the wall and a transfer on their shop window.

The turnout was incredible too. So much so that an hour before the race started the police closed off the road to pedestrians and stopped letting anyone else through. All along the route it was stacked with people half a dozen deep.

You would have to have a heart of stone to suggest seeing that wasn’t worth waiting for.

When I was twelve I spent six hours in 35 degree heat waiting for a Space Shuttle to take off. Finally we saw this little dot disappear into the distance and then in the silence some kid said “is that it?” As good as that was, it can’t really compare to seeing the photo above.

Nevertheless, it makes you proud to be Yorkshire. If you have a fancy bike ride you need hosting, we’re your people.

Well this feels a lot more official now.

Today is the tenth anniversary of my blog. That is a long time. If it was a child, it would soon be finishing primary school! For the fifth anniversary I had balloons. No such care has been taken for this one. Though I do hope you have been “overwhelmed by fun” as my first blog post declared as an aim.

I have not gone back and read a lot of my old posts. They’re probably horrible. My views have changed a lot over the past decade, especially during the past year. I was an idiot when I was 17. I am an idiot now, but at least I know enough to know that. By the time I reach my grandparent’s age, I might actually know something useful.

Stats

• I have written 3,284 posts
• That represents 6.3 posts per week
• 1,444,814 spam comments have been posted
• Last month 15,214 people visited my blog
• The most popular month was June 2013 when 17,651 people visited
• The most popular search term for reaching my blog is “charles darwin”

The Rise of Darwin is a new one. For years the most popular way for people to find my blog was searching for my food chain diagram.